Family Dinners go a Long Way

While I was growing up one thing that my family did every night was eat dinner as a family. It was something that was rarely missed by a member of the family and was essential in our family relationship. I realized that during dinner the conversations would range from what everyone did that day to something as obscure as how to hold a fork the “proper way” at the dinner table. Every night while engaging in conversation with my parents and younger sister I realized that what our family had was important. I learned not to interrupt while someone is talking, to keep my elbows off the dinner table, how to properly ask to have something handed down and when out in a restaurant how to properly ask and thank wait staff. Every night my family would sit together until everyone was done with their meal and we would all help pick up the leftovers and dirty dishes. Some of my friend’s barley had the opportunity to sit down and eat with their entire families; others would tell me that they ate while watching television.

Eating dinner as a family meant the television was off, no one was on the phone and for the most part everyone was pleasant. I realized as I got older and went to friends houses that this was not true for everyone. Eating dinner was different for everybody, as was the food and atmosphere.

Now, as I approach adulthood I am beginning to make connections to things that lead back to values that I personally learned at the dinner table. Working in the restaurant business I see more young children who do not know how to handle themselves at a dinner table. Many children I observe are often kneeling on chairs for no reason, reaching across the table and yelling over their parents requests for them to “quiet down”. When watching children who do not know how to handle themselves at a dinner table I often wonder what their dinner at home is resembles. I feel that there is a connection between poor at home dinner structures and how children will act when they are taken to a restaurant. Parents often seem aggravated when their children do not listen to them however if a parents requests seem foreign to a child they will obviously have a hard time acting differently.

Although the working class is growing and many families now have two working parents, I feel that dinner time routine would be beneficial to young children teaching them the skills they should have to act when they eat in public. Having manners and the skill to “behave” at a dinner table will follow a child for the rest of their lives and if enforced early on will prevent the embarrassment of someday reaching over a future mother-in-law and spilling a drink, rather than just asking to pass the bread.